Puppet Sandwich 2: Trashcan Baby!

This is a play loosely based on the Sesame Street characters. Trashcan Baby is based on 
Garfield, the guy in the Muppets who lived in a trashcan. The Wren is based on Big Bird, 
but not as big. Burnie and Hurt are based on Ernie and Bert!

Garfield (popping his baby head out of a trashcan):
Oh yuck! It sure stinks in this trashcan!

The Wren (looking at Garfield as if he were insane):
Then maybe you should have moved into a condominium!

Garfield (focusing a calculated glare at The Wren):
		Then maybe you were hatched instead of born! You don't have a father!

The Wren (pulling out a leather-bound bible, worn but clearly loved):
		Oh, but I do. Here in the bible it says: Jeremiah 24:7 -And I will give 
them an heart to know me, that I am the Lord: and they shall be my 
people, and I will be their God: for they shall return unto me with 
their whole heart.

Garfield (hides back in his trashcan):
		I can't hear you!

Burnie (continuously trembling, as if afflicted by seizures):
		Don't listen to The Wren! He is smaller than a larger bird and has disease!

Hurt (holding a blowing hair dryer to Garfield's trash can):
		Watch this!

Garfield (still in can):
		It's awfully hot in here!

Burnie (still trembling, but gathering condiments such as mustard and mayonnaise):
		And I'm awfully hungry!

Hurt (pulling out two slices of bread from his Western-style pockets):
		I have a great idea!

[Burnie opens the trashcan and pulls out a steaming Garfield. He places Garfield in-
between Hurt's bread slices. Before either of them has a chance, The Wren gobbles down 
the Garfield sandwich]

Burnie (looking at The Wren in an irritated, yet familiar way):
		Proverbs 23:19-21 says "Hear thou, my son, and be wise, and guide 
thine heart in the way. 20 Be not among winebibbers; among riotous 
eaters of flesh: 21 For the drunkard and the glutton shall come to 
poverty: and drowsiness shall clothe a man with rags".

Hurt (looking at The Wren as if this has happened before):
		Yeah!

The Wren (looking pleased and satisfied):
		In Hebrews 9:22, it says, "In fact, under the Law, almost everything is 
purified by means of blood, and without the shedding of blood, there 
is neither release from sin and its guilt nor the remission of the due and 
merited punishment for sins"

The End