Puppet Skit: "Billy Bob's Stubborn Steed"
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Materials: cowboy hat & any other "country-looking" clothes you can find

Characters:	Billy Bob Cowhorn (a Texas cowboy's son with a strong Texan 
accent), Teacher, a real person.

T:	Hi kids.  Is there anyone here named Billy Bob Cowhorn?  I'm looking for 
Billy Bob Cowhorn.  Does anyone know where he is?

B:	Yeeeeee ha!  (appears at the stage) Howdy Maam, I'm Billy Bob Cowhorn, 
son of Billy Ray and Mary Jane Cowhorn, the fastest cattle wrestlers this side 
of the border.  Our ranch is called "The Bum Steer" . and that's down South 
in Texas for any folks here who ain't heard of it.  Now you folks is lucky I'm 
here at all today, cos I'm madder than a one-eyed mosquito in a swamp full o' 
guitar players . I tell you, I'm so mad I could spit (does a pretend spit).

T:	Can you not spit on the carpet please Billy we only just had it cleaned.  So tell 
us, what seems to be the matter?  Maybe if you tell us we can help you.

B:	I'm mad cos my dang horse didn't want to come to church today.  That 
stubborn mule got it into his pea-brained head that he wanted to stay at the 
ranch and eat horseradish rather than come to church today.  Can you believe 
that? I tell you, that horse gives me more problems than a bathtub full o' 
rattlesnakes . he makes me so mad I could spit (does another pretend spit).

T:	Billy Bob, stop spitting on the carpet!  You're making a mess!

B:	Why, just the other day, I got on my horse to do some bareback calf ropin', 
pole bendin', and barrel racin practice, and that piece of Arizona jerky 
wouldn't budge.

T:	So what happened?

B:	Well eventually my daddy, Mr Billy Ray Cowhorn, he came out and untied 
my horse.  That made a big difference - my daddy's real smart you know.  But 
today, I untied that pile of El Paso refried horseradish and I don't know why in 
tarnation that varmit wouldn't move, but he still wouldn't git in the truck to 
come down to church.  I tell you, that horse makes me so mad I could .

T:	Stop right there Billy Bob!  No more spitting!  You're going to have to help 
me clean this up later.  Now look, you didn't get your horse to come to church 
with you but it doesn't matter - the main thing is that you're here.  Your horse 
doesn't understand what we say so would probably just get bored anyway.

B:	Excuse me Ma'am!  How can you say it don't matter none that my horse ain't 
here?  I need that floppy-eared walking taco with me today so everyone here 
can praise the Lord!

T:	Huh?  You're saying you need your horse so you can praise the Lord?  

B:	Well colour me happy little lady - you got it in one.  But I'm sorry cos I 
couldn't git that stubborn steed into the truck so you folks might as well go on 
back home to your ranches cos there ain't gonna be any praisin' today.

T:	OK . this should be interesting . why do you think you need your horse at 
church so you can praise the Lord?

B:	I don't just think I need my horse . I do need that little Alamosa 
Appalachian!  I want to praise the Lord and now I can't cos that stubborn salt 
licker's back at the ranch munching all my horseradish!  I tell you, that horse 
ain't got no horse sense!

T:	Look Billy Bob, you don't need a horse to help you praise the Lord - you can 
praise God whenever or wherever you are.  Why on earth would you think you 
need a horse just so you can praise the Lord?

B:	Sorry Ma'am but you can't fool ol' Billy Bob Cowhorn!  I read with my own 
two eyes in the Bible where it says that Jesus had to git himself a donkey so he 
could ride on in an' the folks could all praise the Lord.  

Now, I ain't got no donkey - an' I don't want no donkey either cos they're 
more stubborn than a horse!  But I got me a horse so I was gonna bring that 
walking carrot muncher down here so everyone could have a right hoot-nanny 
of a time and git to praising the Lord!  But because I couldn't git him in the 
truck, there's just no way anyone can praise the Lord anymore so I'm sorry 
about that but y'all might as well head on home now, ya hear.  See ya'll later!

T:	Billy Bob, the kids don't need to go home just because there's no horse here.  
What you read in the Bible about Jesus riding into the city on a donkey was 
just one time when people praised the Lord.  There were lots of other times in 
the Bible when people praised the Lord and they certainly didn't need a 
donkey to do it!

B:	Well I don't know about that Ma'am.  Are you sure you're not yanking ol' 
Billy Bob's leg?

T:	No Billy Bob - that's the truth!  If you look through the Bible, you'll see lots 
of times where people were praising the Lord.  You can praise God any time 
and anywhere - all you need to do is just start telling God how wonderful he is 
and how much you love him because that's what praise is!  Hey kids, how 
about we show Billy Bob that we can still praise God and that we don't need a 
horse or anything else to help us do it (get the kids to sing a praise song or just 
shout Hosanna etc).

You see Billy Bob, you can praise God any time and anywhere!

B:	Well Ma'am, I stand corrected!  You know, I'm happier about this than 
barebacked bucking bronco slap bang in the middle of a cornfield.  I'm gonna 
go an' tell this to my friend, ol' One-eyed Pistol Pete - he ain't too accurate 
anymore but he sure keeps you on your toes.  See you round like a hog's rump 
stuffed full of onions!  Bye bye!

- END -

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